The Adventure's of L, Light'n, Larry
by wolflink93
Summary: This is a side series of Death Paper it is called The Adventure's of L, Light’n, Larry. This is a story of when L and Light were 10 years old and created an imaginary friend to go on adventures with. There's a new chapter. Anther one rides the bus.
1. episode 1: Deathgiving Day

**Adventures of L, Light'n, Larry**

**Episode 1: Deathgiving Day**

**By Wolflink93 and Renodin**

**Basinga Production**

**Myth Labs Production**

**Disclaimer: We don't own death note but we do own a roasted turkey.**

**GAME: POST A COMMENT AND POST A SUGGESTION IN IT FOR THE STORY! WE WILL PUT THE FIRST SUGGESTION WE GET INTO THE STORY, AS LONG AS IT IS NOT ANYTHING BAD. IF IT IS OVER TEEN RATING, WE WILL MOVE ONTO THE NEXT COMMENT! THANK YOU ALL, NERDS! **

* * *

**"I told you to dress up in you Mac & cheese costume for Thanksgiving!" Light's mother told him.**

**"Why are we celebrating Thanksgiving anyway? We're Japanese, not American!" Light told her.**

**"Because WERE STUPID!" His mom said.**

**"Well, screw you!" Light told her.**

**"GO buy some… holiday…food… bitch… I'M HUNGRY!" his mother commanded**

**"Fine mom!" Light said in a low pitched, retard voice. Light kicked down his door like an FBI agent (de ja vu) and frolicked down the street, screaming "DON'T JUDGE ME!" As he was walking an old lady wearing a dashiki and an afro waved her fist at Light and yelled "JAAAAAAM!" With a strong pulse in her voice. He went down to the street to Reasol's the grocery store.**

**Light walked into the store. He decided to buy candy instead of good food (WOO HOO! FATTY FOOD) he walked down the aisle, and saw a queer looking little boy. The boy had messy, blue hair, bags under his eyes, white shirt, blue jeans, and no shoes (no service!)**

**The boy was filling a sack with kaundey. Light pulled a stick out of nowhere and began to poke the boy. In slow motion, the boy dropped the sack. He put his hands in the shapes of guns. Then in slow motion, he made shooting noises and pointed the fingers at Light.**

**"Baaaaaaannnng!" The boy repeated in a monotone voice. "Ifffffffff IIIII waaaasss aaaa Kiiiirrraaaaa, yooooouuuu'd beeeee deeeaaad riiiggghhht noooowww." The boy said, still in slow motion.**

**"What's a Kira?" Light asked.**

**"I dunno, but it sounds pretty nasty." The boy told him.**

**"Hi, I'm Light. Who the hell are you?" Light asked.**

**"I'm L! Nice to meet you!" L said.**

**"Why are you named after a letter? Are you some form of freak?" Light asked.**

**"Don't make me bang you again!" L threatened. "I wanna be a detective when I grow up!" L said cheerfully.**

**"I want to possess some form of notebook that can kill anyone, and I will use it to kill bad guys, and you will hunt after me, but we will end up working together, and you'll eventually die, and I'll have a super model girlfriend who also can kill people and I'll live happily ever after." Light said. There was a moment of silence, until Light broke the quietness.**

**"If my grades are good enough." He added.**

**"You should turn that into an anime!" L suggested.**

**"Well, someone is probably recording this conversation right now, and they will make some crappy wanna be anime that is copying my story, and will have a suckey ending, and they will post it on Youtube." Light told L.**

**"Hey, I'm bored, and you made me drop all of my candy. So, what do you think we should do?" L asked.**

**"We need to go on some crazy adventure." Light suggested.**

**"You know, you are starting to get rather corny." L said.(I LIKE CORN)**

**"Well, I have to tell this story to people before Thanksgiving is over, and the people of fanfiction might hunt me down and kill me if I don't meet their freaking expectations and demands." Light told L.**

**"What is fanfiction L asked.**

**"Some place where nerds go to post their stupid little ideas about what they think would make a good story or expansion(like us!)to something they like, though it normally sucks so they had to come to this little crap hole for comfort.(hold me, mommy!)"Light informed L.**

**_4 hours later…or about 10 minutes… not completely sure… don't pressure me!_**

**_I don't get paid enough to introduce time to these bakas who can't even tell time themselves! Man, I should have never watched these stupid animes that just degrate women and show events that could never actually happen in the real world. I'm becoming a Nerd! No! I won't allow it! Shikoshu! Shikoshu itu all to hell! NOOOO! _**

**Light and L were in the dumpster behind Reasol's.**

**"Why are we here again?" L asked.**

**"You said and I quote 'I'm feeling dirty' after you walked by the magazine rack. So, I decided to add on to your emotions, and make you feel soooo dirty that even a shower could not help! Physically AND mentally! And maybe even Spiritually!" Light said.**

**"My soul burns!" L yelled, with his hands raised. "What kind of Thanksgiving special is this? IT HAS NOTHING TO DO WITH A HOLIDAY!" L yelled to the ceiling of the dumpster.**

**"I have an idea! Lets create a person to go on adventures with us!" Light said. L looked at him disgusted.**

**"I don't think that will work between two men. Besides, I don't know you enough to do that, so even if I was a woman… or you were… I think we would be going to fast… so back off!" L ordered.**

**"Ahhh, man!" Light said. (weren't expecting that, were ya? Neither were we, it just kinda… happened. Don't worry, we peed ourselves laughing too!)**

**"How about we imagine someone?" L suggested.**

**"But that won't be nearly as entertaining! Dang, we are going to lose 50 percent of our ratings now! People now don't want clean imaginary friends, they want sex, action… and politics! Damn it!" Light exclaimed.**

**"Umm, okay. I'll imagine his upper half, you imagine his bottom half!" L told him. They began squinting and sweating as they thought long and hard about creating their own little friend.**

******AND THE ADVENTURES OF L, LIGHT'N, LARRY WERE BORN!**

* * *

**Ahh, now for the Thanksgiving part…or Deathgiving, as we wanted to call it, for some stupid little pun, though really, there is no death involved in it… YET!**

**All of Light's relatives and L and their new 'friend', Larry, were all at the Holiday Rock outside to eat their dinner. The rock had been used by soooo many pilgrim prostitutes before them, and there were still stains there! L mistook them for liquid sugar, and he had some bad gas.**

**Light was filling a bowl with gravy so he could throw it at poor people(like us!)when Ryuk walked up behind him. Now, Light had never yet touched a Death Paper, so he could not see him. But, Light sensed the Shinigami, but he thought it was Larry.**

**"I sense _something _in the air." He said outloud. He dropped the bowl of gravy and got mad.**

**"Damn it, Larry!" He yelled. He tackled down the air and starting punching into the... nothingness. They all took a big photo with everyone, including Larry and Jessica Simpson. They would remember this photo….FOR-EV-ER! Ryuk was even in it! Though you couldn't tell, lousy Kodak!**

**__****HAPPY MOTHERS DAY!**

**__****I'm SURE YOU'RE MOM WILL BE HAPPY TO RECEIVE A RING ON THANKSGIVING AND A TURKEY ON THE REAL MOTHERSDAY!**

**__****MERRY CHRISTMAS TO ALL, AND TO ALL A GOOD NIGHT!**

**Oh, I don't want this to end!**

**_Never gonna clean it up,_**

**_No matter how FILTHY IT GETS!_**

**_I like my cheese cold,_**

**_I like my cheese frozen,_**

**_CHEESE!  
JaaAaAaAm!_**

**_Light's family sang this song all throughout the night. (the Cheese Jazz, invented by Renodin! And Wolflink93 came up with the cheese idea… baka shikoshu.)_**

* * *

**_BAKA-Japanese for idiot._**

**_SHIKOSHU- Japanese for damn._**

**_ITU- Japanese for it._**

**_Renodin:Just post some reviews. And also don't forget to review our other story Death Paper. _**

**_Wolflink93:This is a side series to our Death Paper story. We write this one when we are __temporarily __bored with Death Paper. JAaAaAaAMMM!_**


	2. The Death before Christmas Part 1

**The Adventure's of L, Light'n, Larry: The Death Before Christmas**

**Disclaimer: We do not own death note but we do own a bucket of melted cheese.**

* * *

It was one week before Christmas… or maybe it was one month…After last night's party I don't know what is what anymore. 

There was a silhouette of a tall man on someone's lawn. He kept saying "Jaaam!" with pulses in the "aaa" part. It was around two in the morning. He scoped the house for a while, touching the walls… and himself. It was dark, I couldn't tell.

He eventually found a door in the front of the house. Slowly, he opened it and crept inside. When he stepped inside of the house, he screamed…"Ding-Dong DIDDY!" I'm not completely sure what happened next, but I heard an old woman screaming. Then I saw him coming outside with a full trash bag, I ran back home. And here I am now!

* * *

That whole story was told by Light. L, Light'n, Larry were all in Light's room having a sleepover. They were getting ready to play Super Mario Brothers on Light's NES. They had a big bowl of cheese blocks, carefully assorted by **L** (WOO HOO! CHEESE!). 

"How the hell are we supposed to play a one player game when we have three peeps?" L asked.

" " Larry answered.

"Oh that's right! You are damn smart Larry!"

"!" Larry exclaimed. The door to their room bust open. Light's father came in wearing nothing but underwear made of cookies

"Hey wassup homeyos!" Soichiro asked.

"Daddy put some friggin clothes on!" Light ordered.

"Sorry, I ate the tuna and the turkey is still cooking!" Soichiro stated as he pointed to a bag of chips on Light's desk

"Chips Ahoy!" Soichiro said grabbing the bag of chips and leaving.

"So, Light, what are your parents getting you for Christmas?" L asked.

"I dunno probably an ice tray… Or a carrot costume." Light answered. "What about you, L?"

"I don't have parents." L said happily. "You, Larry?" L asked.

"" Larry stated.

"Damn, you don't even deserve all that!" Light said. "Who are your parents anyways?" He asked.

""Larry reminded.

"Oh yeah, WE are! That was a craaaazy day!" Light said. He pointed his finger at the NES, and it became a Wii

"What the hell is THAT?" L asked.

"It's from the footure!" Light exclaimed like an idiot.

"What games does we get?" L asked.

"SUPER PAPER MARIO!" Light yelled in a squecky, high pitched voice. They played for a few hours, singing the Weird Al Show Theme the whole time.

"" Larry suggested.

"Yeah, we should go dumpster diving! This is boring!" L said.

They threw the Wii at the wall and walked outside.

* * *

"It's a camel!" A mother said as the future Matsuda came out of her tummy. "Or it might be a boy." She added.

* * *

"Oh yeah, the camera loves you, come on, take off that small shirt!" A camera man said to the famous child porn star, Misa.

* * *

The three heroes… or was it criminals… oh well… they went back to the dumpster behind Reasols, they started digging through all the garbage. 

"I found an axe! A bloody axe!" Light said, holding a bloody can of axe spray. Light pushed the button to spray. A fat hoe walked by the dumpster, sexually moaning.

"I found… The Bill of Rights!" L exclaimed "And it says I can get a tax deductible… just by slowly taking off my pants! I'll be right back." L added

"But you're a kid! You don't gotta pay no taxes!" Light said.

"I ain't no kid! My DIC… tionary says otherwise!" L yelled. L opened his dictionary.

Kid- a young goat (n) (subject) (bitch). After closing the book and sticking out his tongue, he started squeezing it.

"I love squeezing my DIC… tionary!" L added.

"!" Larry screamed.

"Stop lying." L said.

"No, L, there really is a fat old lady corpse here!" Light exclaimed. L and Light opened the dumpster doors and started jumping on the corpse.

"BOUNCY!" They yelled. A little baby came out of a fat roll of the corpse.

"Goo goo gahgee!" (Translation: that's why you're number one Light!) It said. Light gave a thumbs up to the camera as it closed in on him.

* * *

"Let's go play toss the Dynamite!" L said. 

"What about the corpse?" Light asked.

"LA-TER!" L answered.

The three went to a nearby park with their dynamite in hand. They hit the ON button, and the timer was set to ten minutes.

"Catch, L!" Light shouted, throwing the bomb, L caught it and tossed it to Larry.

"Catch it Larry!" He shouted. The dynamite landed on the grass.

_1 minute later…_

"It's okay, Larry, take your time." L said, calmly.

* * *

Will Larry EVER throw the dynamite? To be continued…

* * *

** Wolflink93: This is our Christmas special The Death before Christmas Part 1 (Just for those people who didn't read the title) There will probably be maybe a total of 3 or 4 parts to this story so stay tuned.**

**Renodin: AND PLEASE REVIEW I BEG OF YOU... I HAVE TO PEE!**


	3. The Death before Christmas Part 2

**The Adventure's of L, Light'n, Larry: The Death before Christmas**

**Chapter 2: Part 2**

**Disclaimer: We do not own death note but we do own a raw frozen oozing black gooey bucket of seaweed (OH YEAH!) **

* * *

_Last time… on TAOLLL… (Note: its pronounced t, a, o and then triple L)_

"It's okay, Larry, take your time." L said, calmly

* * *

(A digital clock ticks down from 0:10. A bass drum and triangle beat with each second, just like on the show, Everybody Loves Ra… I mean, the show, 24!)

* * *

"Where the hell did Larry go?" Light asked.

"His parent's don't let him play with bombs." L said.

"WE'RE his parents!" Light exclaimed.

"When I cleaned dishes at McDonalds, I learned how to defuse bombs. Do you know how many bombs get planted on McDonalds?" L said. Light changed into an orange jumpsuit, and L ran and hid behind a tree. He threw Light a… WALKIE TALKIE! And a pair of scissors!

"Why did you make me wear this jumpsuit?" Light asked.

"Their _stylish!_" L said, twirling. (I'm not so sure about that kid.)

"Okay, now listen carefully. One, hear me out here, ONE, yes just ONE FRIGGEN false move could end the show Family Guy as we know it!" L said, just then Peter Griffin walked by, giggling.

"Now, remember, ONE, yes, just ONE FR…" L was interrupted by Light.

"Friggin tell me how to disable the hackin' bomb!" Light screamed into the walkie talkie. The bomb had two seconds left

"Ya know it hurts my feelings and my eardrums when you scream at me like that." L said.

"I'm so sorry! I lost my temper!" Light said, with tears in his eyes, sobbing. They both looked at their favorite photograph. It showed Light pushing L on a swing on pink background. It had words that read: Always and forever, but were NOT GAY! SERIOUSLY!

"Now Light, cut the BLUE WIRE." L said.

"Okay, the blue… wait a minute they're all red!" Light said; sweat rolling down his… gonads. A man named Gyaretto (Wolflink93: That's me!), who was indeed fat and stinky. (Hey, I'm not fat… or stinky! I wear deodorant every other week!)… Fine, he was glowing a red aura.

"Actually, those wires aren't red. They are more of a magenta." Gyaretto stated in a heavenly like voice.

"You must have drunk too many tequilas. Those wires are pink!" Light said

"There purple you dick!" Gyaretto said.

"Well, actually, now that I think about it, those wires are definitely blue." Light said

"Cut it!" L commanded.

"Which one?" Light asked.

"The one that says 'cut here to defuse'!" L said. There was one second left. Light slooooowlyyy and draaaamatically pushed the scissors over to the wire. Then, in a stroke of bad luck he dropped the scissors!

"Well, I guess I better piiiick iiit uuup!" Light said. Trying to be cool, Light kicked up the scissors, but they were thrust into his forehead.

"Ahhh, damn it! I broke the scissors!" Light screamed. He threw the scissors at a building and sat down mad. The timer went down to half a second. Ah, screw it, it went down to ZERO.

"Ohhhhhh, shiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiip!" Everyone yelled. A flag erected from the bomb, which read 'BOOM!'

"Well…" Light said.

"To the dumpster!" L exclaimed

"Yep, she is still here." Light said. They looked at the corpse with little leprechauns chewing on it.

"Shoo, you little elf rejects!" Light yelled at them. They all ran off. Light and L jumped on the rotten corpse for about an hour, cause it was pretty fun.

"Hey, hey, hey, hey… I got an idea. Let's look in her pockets!" L explained. They started shuffling through her pockets, and found a NOTE! It read:

Yo bitch!

I'm gonna tell you what I did and leave this note on the corpse so you'll never get it! Okay, so like, I was all like "I'm gonna go kill Mrs. Claus! And all that shit!" I decided to break into her house and kill her. She lives alone since Santa and her got divorced.

Screw you,

From… uhhh……

Rey Pencil, age 18…

"R-R-R-R-Rey……………." Light stuttered.

"P-P-P-P-Pencil……………." L stuttered.

" - - - -" Larry stuttered.

"You're right! He does sound awfully familiar!" Light said.

"You thinking what I'm thinking?" L asked.

"Yeah, I think so, LET'S GO SING CHRISTMAS CHAROLS!" Light yelled. They leaped out of the dumpster grabbed a guitar and amplifier they found in the street, and went to the house of…

Teenage Rey Pencil!

* * *

"Well, Watari, we fixed your voice box. But, it will never be the same." A surgeon told Watari.

"What-do-you-mean-uf-fu-qh!" Watari coughed.

* * *

DING-DONG! The trio rang the bell to Rey's house at the same time.

"Is everything ready?" Light asked.

"" Larry said.

"Yeah, I guess I shouldn't doubt you!" Light said. A teenager, who they recognized as Rey opened the door. "Hey wassup little whores!" He said in his way of saying hello.

"Silent night! Holy night! All is br…" They sang until Rey interrupted them

"Shut up! Sing me a song that has _edge_!" Rey said.

"Okay, just a sec." Light said. He began whispering to L.

"Alright, L! Put the sleeping gas into the guitar amp!" Light said.

"Why?" L asked,

"To put him to sleep, duh!" Light said.

"Why would we want to do that?" L asked, confused.

"Just freakin' go along with it!" Light commanded. L did so.

"You want a song with _edge_? I'll show you _edge_! Come on, one, two, three, four." Light yelled. Nothing happened.

"What song are we playing?" L asked

"Oh no you did not just ask that. We've been rehearsing it for weeks! And Larry still can't play his chello!" Light yelled. Rey just stared at them, with a goofy smile.

"We haven't rehearsed anything!" L yelled.

"Well we play it everyday, whether or not we like it!" Light said.

"Well, just tell me the fucking name and maybe I'll friggin remember!" L yelled. With anger, L reached his neck out in front of him. "FagGOT!" L yelled, hearing a snapping noise.

"Umm… I kinda dislodged my head." L said.

"Now it matches your hunchback and your ass!" Light said, happily. "Now, let's sing our theme song, THE WORLD… By Nightmare!

"Hirogaru yami no naka kawashiatta kakumei no chigiri! Aishita yume ni mebaeta, aku no hana!" They sang horribly, and the gas from the amp came out and Rey breathed it in. He fell down and started… sleeping and hyperventilating.

"Se kai wo, baby!" Light said, in a low pitched voice. He signaled for L and Larry to go inside the house.

"I didn't know you could speak German!" L said, walking inside.

"Me either." Light replied. They walked in to look for 'clues.' They looked around, and saw what looked like a bathroom door. They walked in and the room changed into Rey's bedroom!... With a toilet next to his bed. L sat down on the toilet seat.

"What the hell are you doing?" Light asked.

"I have to go!" L replied. "But freakin' Larry won't get out of my LAP!" L complained.

* * *

"Gimme back my afro!" Afro guy yelled crying and punching on a wall in a Solitary confinement building.

* * *

"He has a sticky ramen noodle in his sock drawer! Sus-pis-cious!" Light said in a high pitched voice, holding up a thong. He held it above his head, with a proud face, as the "Legend of Zelda, Ocarina of Time" music (When you open a chest) played. A message window popped up below Light.

"You got a Sticky Thong! Set it to X, Y, or Z, from the item select sub-screen, use it with X, Y, or Z to confuse your enemies!" It read

"I could use this!" Light said stuffing it within his pocket.

"". Larry said.

"Where did you find that note?" L asked

"". Larry answered.

"Let's read it!" Light said. They all stared at each other for about 5 seconds, and then read the note:

Dear hoe,

If you are reading this, then you suspected Rey Pencil of killing Ms.Claus. Ha-ha, you dick! It was not really him! It was ME! I AM……………

Uhhh…

From, Misa….?

"This note is so convincing, I believe every word of it!" L said.

* * *

**Renodin: Is the killer REALLY the child porn star Misa?**

**Wolflink93: Suck it. Now review, we need to know if these stories are good or bad!**

**Note: Also review our other story Death Paper!**

**Peter Griffen: Ah-hehhehhehe!**


	4. The Death before Christmas Part 3

**The Death before Christmas**

**Chapter 3**

**Part 3**

**Cheeze is yo friend!**

**Note: The reason why this was so late is because last week there was a black out because of the ice storm here in Oklahoma so we had know way to work on this so sorry. But to say that we are sorry this is gonna be one long chapter.**

**Disclaimer: We don't own Death Note but we do own a bottle of cheezey farts. **

* * *

"Alright, so some person named MisAH killed Ms.Clause?" Light asked.

"It's pronounced me-za, you jack ass! Don't you know who she is?" L asked.

"No, who?" Light asked.

"She is only the most famous child porn star in the entire world!" L said, with a slight lump in his pants. The lump started shaking.

"Woops, there goes my vibrator!" L said. Light and Larry stared at him strangely, with the 'are-you-some-freakin-queer'look, L stuck his hand in his pants, and with a happy face, pulled out his…

I-phone!

"Oh, for a second there I thought that was your I-dick!" Light said.

"?" Larry asked.

"Well, Larry, that's the safest place for my phone." L said

"" Larry said.

"Well, if I get kicked there then, it SUCKS to be me!" L answered.

"Anyway, isn't child pornography illegal?" Light asked.

"So is necrophilia, but people still do it!" L said. "She is taking pictures at the mall." L said.

"Lets…….." Light said. "Go!" L said. 5 seconds later. They jumped off the scene and arrived at the mall.

"" Larry said.

"Yeah, there are a lot of… things." Light said.

"What the hell, that wasn't even remotely funny." L said. "Hey a McDonald's! Lets eat!" He added.

* * *

"Welcome to good burger, home of the good burger, can I take your order?" the man behind the counter said.

"Uhh, yeah, I was thinking, maybe a, uh-kuph-df!" L started having a coughing fit, with spit and mucus going all over the cashier. After a few minutes, he was dripping with snot. There was a green puddle on his feet.

"Can I take your order?" He asked.

"Umm, how about… a… big… mac?" L asked.

"Sure alright. That'll be, uhh, $7.50." The guy said.

"WTF! That's way tooooo overpriced (WTF)." L yelled.

"Yeah. So, you buying it?" The man asked.

"OKAY!" L said in a high pitched voice.

_5 minutes later…_

"Here's your burger!" The man said, handing it to L. L walked off without paying.

"Wait a minute!" The man said, suddenly growing horns and fiery red eyes.

"HE OWES ME $7.50!!!" The man said with an evil screech.

* * *

L took a bite off the burger, and spit it into his hand. He put the piece back into the big-mac.

"You can have it, Larry. This isn't sweet." L said, handing the burger to Larry. It fell onto the floor. "Larry, use your manners!" L yelled.

"So, where is Misa?" Light asked.

"She'll be in the electronic section in an hour and a half." L said. "Come on, let's go meet Santa! He's in the beverage section." L said, running toward it. Light followed him.

* * *

"It's….. It's…. PERFECT!" Soichiro said, looking at the can of yams costume he was sewing on the lawn, naked. A message appeared below Soichiro.

"You have found a can of Yams Costume! Well… here you go… fagGOT!" The window went away. Some kid came up to the can while Soichiro was smiling. The kid punched it. A hole appeared and leaked yams. The kid ran off.

"NOOOOOoOoOoOO!" Soichiro screamed, on his knees looking at the sky.

* * *

"What you want fo' Christmas!" A Chinese Santa asked a kid, speaking really fast.

"Uhh, how about…" A kid in his lap said.

"YOU TAKE TOO LONG!" The Santa yelled, throwing the boy out the window. A Chinese kid hovered up from his chair in another store and onto Santa's lap.

"What you want fo' Christmas!?" Santa asked.

"FIRETRUCK!" The boy said immediately.

"What color?" Santa asked sweating. The camera zoomed in on the kid's mouth.

"RED!" The kid said dramatically. A person (yes a person) took a picture and then Santa threw the kid at a wall.

L, Light, and Larry went up to the Santa line and shoved everyone out of the way. Larry pushed a kid out of the way, but to everyone else the kid just fell.

"Yo, Santa be-YATCH!" Light screamed at Santa, in his lap. L and Larry surrounded the Santa.

"We gonna hang 'round here, k?" L asked.

_1 hour later…_

"And then when I was six I said my first words! My mom thinks it was trousers, but I think it was tweezers! And then, when I was eight I got potty trained! But, I still wet the bed!" Light told the Santa.

"Who doesn't?" The Santa asked.

"LIGHT! It's been an hour! We have thirty minutes before Misa leaves!" L said.

"Hey, Santa man! We gotta go visit a child porn star! C-ya!" Light said. L, Light and Larry fell flat on their faces. They were cardboard decoys!!!

"Phew, that was close!" Light said. They were all swinging on pipes on the ceiling with grappling hooks. Light, however, was holding his grappling hook backwards by the blade, cutting his hand, and fell to the ground. After standing back up and swearing at the rope, they walked to the electronics store to meet their suspect, Misa.

"K, are we ready?" Light asked.

"" Larry said.

"Of course, you are, but what about L?" Light said.

"I got the leftover sleep powder from when we took out Rey. I have a pocket knife and my handy-dandy notebook!" L said.

"Yep, and I got my nun-chucks, pistol, and my windwaker!" Light exclaimed. "Let's go in!" Light added. Even though the door was open, they busted through the window of the outlet. Dozens of acne-ridden teens inside the store stared at them. Light looked around, and spotted two ninjas guarding a door.

"That must be where Misa is!" L said. They approached the door.

"We need to see Misa!" Light screamed in their faces.

"Ummm, ya, I don't speak English. Uhhh… boku wa nihondo…" The left ninja said.

"But… we speak English, and we live in Japan." L said.

"No, you live in Jamerica, Japanese America!" The right ninja said.

"Then you should speak English!" Light said.

"I told you, boku wa nihondo!" The left ninja said.

"But…" Light said.

"**BOKA WA NIHONDO!!!" **The right ninja yelled. The screen blended with a new street background, and the FF7 battle music played. Light's speedbar filled up. He selected ITEM from his… phone… He used his WINDWAKER. He screamed out loud: "LEFT C, EMPTY, RIGHT C, EMPTY!" After screaming the… code, 'A window popped up as he moved the windwaker around in a very gay way (That rhymes). The window read: You conducted the command melody! Light put away the windwaker, and began moving his index finger back and forth, saying "Cle-FAIRY!" Over and over. All of the nerds were under Light's control! One of them dropped his PEPSI-COLA can.

"Hey, you dropped your subliminal message!" L warned the nerd.

Using his mind, Light made the nerds approach the ninjas the nerds bumped into the ninjas, and fell down…. Dead…

"Woahh! Those kids are really getting on my ass!" The left ninja said.

_L's turn…_

"I'll confuse you with my hit T.V. show, L's Pleasure Hour!!!" L said. He pulled a fifty inch plasma-flat screen T.V. from his pants.

"Do you have to put everything in there?" Light asked.

"YESSSA! I keep everything in my man land area!" L said.

"So now you have an amusement park down there?" Light asked, L ignored him and put the T.V. on channel…. 6,000,000,000,000. The T.V. began playing L's Pleasure Hour! A narrator appeared and spoke in a… gay, freaking voice. (check profile to see what it sounds like)

"It's L's Pleasure time!" Starring L and his new friend, the wall!" He said. The audience clapped so damn hard. Everything went quiet, All you could hear was the sound of a BAM and L was grunting happily. After one hour of this, the camera zoomed in on L. He was sitting in a chair, hitting a wall with his fist.

"Alright, that was L's Pleasure Time! Screw you, and good bye!" The narrator said, flipping everybody off. The T.V. exploded. The ninjas lost 5 HP, and became confused. The ninjas had! 7000 HP left.

_Larry's turn…_

"The left ninja screamed as a small hole appeared in his gut and blood oozed out. Doing 2500 damage. Larry had used his Imaginary Knife!" Light narrated.

"Woooahhh, this is getting graphic!" L said. Light and L were in a glass… box above the… stands (WTF where'd they come from?)

"And it looks like Larry has one more move! And… TOUCHDOWN! HE KILLED THE LEFT NINJA!

"What level are you?" The right ninja asked.

"." Larry said.

"How did you get that strong? Smoken' sink water?" The ninja asked.

* * *

"Uhhh… ohhh, yeah!" A voice inside Light's room groaned. His mom went to the door and knocked.

"Uhh, Light, what are you doing?" She asked, wearing a cheese outfit. The noise stopped. She opened the door, and saw…

"Soichiro?! What the hell are you doing in Light's room?!" She asked shocked.

"I'm trying to make the pop burst out of the bottle! And it's… orgasmically fun!" Soichiro said, hitting a PEPSI-COLA bottle on Light's wall in his room. Soon, the soda exploded all over them.

"Hey… your subliminal message exploded!" The mom said, looking at her lettuce covered husband.

* * *

"I'll take the chicken!" Matsuda said to the cashier.

* * *

_Team L's turn is over… Team ninja starts…_

"Ummmm… death… attack…" The last ninja said. He pointed at L, Light, and Larry, and they just sort of… poofed out of the store.

Dododo dooo do-do-do-ddd (FF7 victory theme.) The ninja claimed victory!

"Ugh, if we want to see Misa, we have to get some training." Light said sadly.

"" Larry suggested.

"How much does the E&G Mortal Combat training cost?" L asked.

"" Larry answered.

"Five whole dollars?!" L and Light said, shocked. Though it took a while, they were able to stea… I mean, beg for the money from a six year old. And Light was the only one who got a black eye! They went to the E&G Mortal Combat Training outlet in the mall and paid their entry fees. Light was getting training by Elvis, and L was getting training from… G-man.

_1 hour… and several boo-boos later…_

"Alright, Light, you should be able to fight those ninjas and meet the child porn star, Misa. I have taught you in the skills of air guitar, and burning fingers! Go kick some assss…aulting ninjas! Thank ya, thank ya very much!" Elvis said, kicking Light out.

"K, L! Tym tu goe shoot da nimgas with yo' knew I-Gun! It bee da upgraded vershan uf you I-Phone." G-man said, throwing L out.

"?" Larry asked.

"Yes, Larry…" Light said, dramatically.

"We're ready…" L added, dramatically. They all pimp walked (except L, who was 'mowin' da lawn') to the electronics store while the theme from the A-team played. The window was still broken, so they kick down the door. There was still only one ninja.

"So, you faggots have returned? And you brought three kids with you?" The ninja asked, looking at a bundle of sticks next to him.

"Let's do this thang!" Light said, moving his head in a circle. "But first, let me put on my Tu-Tu!" He added dramatically. Everyone paused for a minute as Light held up a tu-tu. He giggled in a low pitch as he slipped into it.

"Time to die!" The ninja said, making weird hand signs.

"You cannot stand up to my AIR GUITAR!!!" Light screamed, making weird hand signs too and then pulling out nothing. He acted like he was playing a guitar, and made horrible, tone-deaf, phony guitar noises (check profile.) It went a little something like this! (Kalsejf dsfkljas sdkljf asdf.)

"Nooo… no… you… you… can… not…" The ninja said as he fell down to the ground, twitching and drooling, and mas… I mean… more drooling.

"Se kai wo, bitch!" Light said.

"Ya know, you should get a better catchphrase." L said.

"I know!" Light said like a sexy schoolgirl.

* * *

"I hope I'm not being forward but do you mind if I chew on your butt?" Gyaretto asked a sexy little schoolgirl.

"I'm too sexy for you!" The school girl said in a idiotic low pitched manly voice.

"GAH!" Gyaretto yelled, walking, and writing something in a black notebook. (Dum-Dum Duuuuum!)

* * *

"Let's proceed!" L said. They pimp walked into the room.

* * *

"OeOe!" Michael Jackson screamed.

* * *

The next room had a stone floor, walls, and three staircases illuminated by torches.

"Woah… there IS a dungeon in the employee's only bathroom!" L said.

"Yeah, it's like, so, like, ghetto!" Light said. A person dressed in a golden robe appeared in front of them.

"If yeast infection… I mean… If ye wish to rendezvous with Lady Misa then thou must each pass the…" He said.

"THE TRIALS!" He added dramatically. He pushed each one down a different staircase.

* * *

_Light's Trial…_

"WTF man? WTF was that for?" Light asked as a man came up to him.

"Time to get crunchy! WHEN IN MILK!" Captain Crunch, the enemy said!

The Pokemon Gym Battle music started playing in the background. Each one had zero pokemon!

Captain Crunch wielded his large Spoon of Doom! Light wielded his Wii Nunchucks.

"You will suffer greatly!" Light yelled, hitting CC with his nunchucks.

0 Damage!

"Pi…kaaaa…CHUUU!" CC yelled smacking Light with his spoon.

12 Damage! Light: 38 HP, CC: 50 HP

_Damn my game controller don't seem to harm him. Maybe… yesss…_ Light thought, grabbing a pistol from Duck Hunt and pelted CC with bullets!

"BaAaAaAaAaAaAm!" Light made sound effects.

0 Damage.

"Milk Urine!" CC yelled, shooting urine with milk out of a water gun.

2 Damage!

Light: 36 HP CC: 50HP

"Wait… I, still have a sticky thong from Rey's house!" Light said. He took it out of his pants.

"Sticky Thong Strike!" Light yelled flinging it at CC.

40 Damage!

"Ohhhh, crap, of crunchy crap, now I'm confused!" CC yelled. He attempted to use Tackle, but he hurt himself in confusion!

13 Damage!

CC fainted!

Light gained 400 exp!

Light looked in front of him, and a door opened. He walked through.

* * *

L looked around the room he was currently in. A strange being fell from the sky!

"I'm Gannondorf! And you're gonna die!" Gannondorf, the king of Evil said. He floated into the air and laughed maniacally and homo sexually.

"I already know how to beat you!" L said happily. Gannondorf conjured an energy ball and blasted it toward L. L hit it back to G-dog, G-dog hit it back, L hit it back, G-dog hit it back, L hit it back. G-dog was smacked in the face by the energy ball! While he was stunned, L launched a gumball out of his I-Gun! It hit G-dog, making him vulnerable! He ran over to G-dog and pulled out his pocket knife and slashed G-dog repeatedly until he was dead, or was he?

"Haha! Loser!" L taunted. The corpse began to shake. KABOOM! There was an explosion of while light, and Gannondorf became Gannon!

"Oh, sh…" L began to say.

"…ip." Said L.

"Like, ROAR!" The huge monster that was Gannon roared. Gannon swung his two huge swords, but L hopped over them. L shot gumballs repeatedly from his I-Gun! They stunned Gannon, and he hit his tail with his pocket knife!

"Wow… that was easier than I thought it would be." L said, proceeding to the next room.

* * *

Light and L appeared in the same room, which was a glass box over a football field. They gave each other the Will Smith hi-five. They grabbed the microphones, turned in their chairs and faced the cameras.

"Hey, homos, I amYagami Light!"

"And I am L!"

"We're here tonight to watch Larry, our imaginary friend, fight to the death!" Light said.

"And here he comes now, onto the stadium!" L exclaimed. (camera zooms in onto empty football field)

"And the crowd goes wild!" Light said. (camera zooms in onto empty football stands. All that can be heard is the wind.)

"Wow, here comes…" Light began to say. (camera zooms in on Soichiro bathing in his sink filled with vegetable oil)

"… Here comes Larry's enemy! Another imaginary friend, the immortal Gary!" Light screamed, with his mole popping.

"They're staring each other down…" L said expectantly.

"OMG, what a blow!" Light yelled.

"Eww…" L said.

"No, you perv! Larry just punched that guy in his subliminal message!" Light said.

"Ooo, that's gotta hurt!" L said.

"And now… Gary is chewing off his ear!" Light said.

"Ohh, the humanity!" L said.

"Holy sweet mother of American Idol! Look at Larry rip those nipples! Look at allll the blood!

"Oh, that is so fake!" L said.

"Gary just gave Larry a colonic irrigation!" Light exclaimed.

"Gary is… ewwww!" Light said, shaking his head in a circular motion.

"Larry is giving Gary a disectime!" L yelled.

"A humanoid figure of fire has appeared where Gary was!" Light narrated in a very sexy voice, flipping his hair back.

"I think Larry has claimed victory!" L said, flipping his hair too.

The door opened and shut as if someone came in.

"Yeeeeeaahhh Larry!" Light said, giving him the manly mid-air chest bump. If you couldn't see Larry, it'd look oh so wrong. The golden sage appeared.

"You're the punk who pushed us" L said

"!" Larry said. Everyone gasped.

"Larry watch your language!" Light said.

"Thou may now meet Misa." The sage said. Everyone cheered, and L had a lump in his pants.

"First, I need to store my I-Gun in a more appropriate spot." L said, pulling it out of his pants, removing the lump.

"IN YOUR MOUTH!" The sage yelled. Everyone stared at him for a minute, and he pushed them into a hole.

They ended up back into the electronic store, facing the two ninjas who were alive again.

"W…" Light said.

"T…" L said.

"…" Larry said. The ninjas got into a combat stance and pointed at another door.

"THAT is where Misa is! You went into the bathroom!" The left ninja said, some kid walked up to them and said! "Wah-Wahh-Wahhhh!"

* * *

KNOCK-KNOCK-KNOCK! Soichiro and Light's mothers ears perked up! They were both dressed up like cereal bowls.

"It's me! I'm a Giddian!" The man at the door said.

_That man must be a salesman…_ Soichiro thought.

"Quickly, HIDE!" Soichiro yelled in a nasally voice. They both jumped behind the couch. Their cereal bowls broke and milk and cereal went everywhere

"Sniff… milk…. Sniff…Everywhere…" Soichiro said, rubbing the soggy cereal alllll over his nude body.

"I know you're in there!" The giddian said at the door, in a low pitched-idiot like voice. Soichiro and his wife were in their house, crying over the milk, and rubbing the cereal allllllll over eachother. The giddian and his camera crew(wtf?) busted down the door and went inside.

"Everyone! Get this on film! This is hot!" The giddian said.

"Yeah! We could post this on cerealfetish One of the camera men said.

* * *

L, Light, and Larry walked over to the room where Misa was. They tried to do the pimp walk, but after their battles, they were just too tired. It looked more like they were drunk and had to pee. They opened the door and walked through a hallway. After they shut the door behind them, they could hear a pipe organ playing the Super Mario Brothers theme, so evil and maniacally. To their left, they saw a door that said: Misa's...uhhh...room...yeah, room...

They kicked down the door and ran inside, spotting Misa eating tuna from a can.

"Why did you kill Ms. Claus?" Light asked, screaming and spitting in her face.

"Oh, that wasn't me." Misa said. The camera zoomed in on L, Light's, and Larry's shocked faces. The screen faded.

* * *

_TO BE CONTINUED...CHECK ON CHRISTMAS DAY FOR FINAL EPISODE OF THE DEATH BEFORE CHRISTMAS..._

**Wolflink93: Well here you go nerds we posted It happy! Well I have made an amv for our fanfic death paper check profile for the link to my video so there you go nerds this is our biggest chapter ever made it is 3400 words!…… Everybody do the cow dance moo moo moo moooOoOoO.**


	5. The Death before Christmas Part 4

**The Death before Christmas**

**Chapter 4**

**Part 4**

**Disclaimer: We don't own Death Note but we do own a death star. **

* * *

_Last time on taoLLL…_

"I didn't do it!" Misa stated.

* * *

"How do we know you didn't do it?" Light questioned. 

"Because I'm a pornstar!" Misa screamed like a banshee.

"Okay…" L responded, walking out the door with Larry. Light just sat there smiling.

"Uhhh… Light?" Misa said. Light then opened his mouth, still smiling, and actual Rockin' Roll music came out which sounded like Haruka Kanata by Asian Kung-Fu Generation, there was also guys in the background saying "Soi!" In a whisper like tone. (Check profile for song)

"I think I'm having a period!" Misa exclaimed, with a weasel chewing on her face.

"Bitch!" Light screamed, walking out the door too.

* * *

"That's it we need to end this story! **WHO DID IT!**" L, Light, and Larry screamed. 

"I did!" Somebody screamed.

"ELVIS!" L, Light, and Larry screamed. Elvis pulled the costume off revealing Arrekasu in a Team Rocket uniform. (Renodin: That's me!)

"Who are you?" L asked nonchalant, completely ignoring the narration.

"I'm me!" Arrekasu responded.

"Who's me!?" L asked.

"You!" Arrekasu answered.

"Me!?" L said.

"Yes!" Arrekasu said.

"What!?" L screamed.

"When!" Arrekasu screamed back.

"Five o'clock!" L responded/screamed.

"Ok here's my address to my Death Star!" Arrekasu said, handing a piece of paper that said. "4111 Moonsonway"

"So what's your name?" L asked.

"I am…" He began to say.

* * *

"How do me know you?" Near asked Mello. 

"…Me no know… me like chocolate…" Mello stated.

* * *

"ARREKUSANDORO!... But you can call me Arrekasu" Arrekasu said, reading from a stack of papers that had words on the front of it that read script. 

"Woah, that's a fancy name!" Light said.

"Yeah, faaancy!" L said with a hill billy accent, flipping his hair.

"Now… face my MIN…" Arrekasu began to say but was interrupted by L.

"Minute?" L asked

"Uhh… no… MINIONS!!!" Arrekasu said. Arrekasu hovered into the air and flew away.

"Where did he go?" L asked.

""Larry answered.

"Death Star!?" L, and Light said shocked.

"What's that?" L asked.

"Apparently it is a rip off of the Death Egg from Sonic Adventures Video games, you know, the thing Dr. Robotnic rides in!" Light stated.

"……" Larry stuttered.

"No! Star Wars is just a crappy rip off of Napoleon Dynamite, created by enslaved Hindu children who worship eye brows!" Light exclaimed.

"Well… let's go to IHOP and rent a spaceship to go after them!" L said. They ran across the street to IHOP.

* * *

"Alright, nobody move! It's time for you orphan's on a field trip to IHOP to get somewhat sexually abused!" The leader of the Belly Bangers said, the leader of a gang of fat gangstas. The Belly Bangers were obese, had long beards which they constantly rubbed for pleasure. They wore no shirts, because their bellies got to hot and sweaty. They all had the same face, head, and hair like L and Light. And they also had an imaginary Belly Banger. 

"It's like looking in one of those smelly mirrors at the carnival!" Said Light, walking up to them.

"It's… It's… It's… It's… It's…" L said.

"It's… It's… It's… It's… It's… What?" Light asked.

"THE BELLY BANGERS!!!" L screamed, lifting his arms in the air and was suddenly in a chair like in Death Note episode 11 (When he heard the word Shinigami and freaked I mean he literally **FREAKED OUT!**)

_Flashback L's POV_

_It was in those days… black and white… little tears and rips in the paper screen… I was in an English orphanage… I had eaten a bowl of Tuna flavored pudding and washed it down with strawberry quick…_

* * *

"Ooo, ooo, is this where I come in?" Light asked walking into the flashback 

_"Get the hell outta here!" _Flashback L said. The present time L walked onto the screen too.

"Did I really look _that_ ugly back then?" L asked.

_"You still are!"_ The Flashback L said. L sniffed and walked off screen, with a hair falling off his head. It left a crater in the sidewalk where it landed.

"Aww, you're sad!" Light said, going off with L. A therapist suddenly comes on screen saying.

"It's okay to feel sad." He said weirdly but then was shot in the back by the Flashback L.

* * *

_I was walking down a dark alley, when the owner of the orphanage gave me my "happy pills"… after he left… a rainbow… appeared out of a dumpster behind Reasol's… I tried to climb it… when I fell in… the dumpster…_

_"Get out of trash-a-Canada home of the waffle burger and home of the garbage!" Soichiro said moving his head and arms in a slow, gay fashion._

_I stepped out of the can struggling to get over the side, but ended up hurting my crouch when I fell out._

_"Ow, my phone!" L said, a bulge in his pants shaking and making high pitch noises. I reached into my pants and pulled out my homephone… it's cord was plugged about 100 feet away, in the orphanage, I refused to answer it, and threw it… at the wall… but still plugged into… the other wall… it flung back… and hit my face… breaking the phone… my precious, beautiful, face… and that was my FIRST mistake… _

* * *

"But wait, you said he was ugly!" Light said. 

"I'm beautiful… but in an ugly way…" L said shaking his fist in the air.

* * *

Soichiro dropped the book he was holding. 

"What's wrong?" his wife asked with concern.

"I feel… like… someone is talking… about my trash-a-Canada in England…" Soichiro said, looking down.

* * *

_Anyway… I walked… back… to my… room so… I sat down… then… the Belly… Bangers… busted in…_

_We were on a pirate ship… the leader… he pulled out a knife… and a bottle of chocolate sauce! He poured it on my face… showing no mercy… then he thrust down the knife… into a jar… of peanut butter! He rubbed it all over_

_ALL OVER_

_All over my face… and then…_

_THEN…_

_Then… he licked it off! _

_Then things got bad… they turned me over…_

_We were at a carnival… and they were all on Merry go Rounds, and their fat was jiggling_

_JIGGLING_

_Jiggling the whole time. They came down… took off my shirt… and shaved_

_SHAVED_

_Shaved my back with… THEIR TEETH!_

_Then… they got a magic… marker… and wrote the letters… BB… on my… diiiiiiiiimples… then they sexily said in my ear…_

_"You've been Belly Banged!"_

_"NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!" I yelled… I was scared… for life…_

_End Flashback _

* * *

"See!" L said nonchalant lifting his shirt over his head to show Light his back. There was a tooth embedded in his back next to his right shoulder blade, and their was also a face growing that said in a tiny voice "Help me!" 

"Cool! It's a talking face!" Light exclaimed, pointing at it.

"A lot of faces talk. Light. L said.

"Yeah, but this one's on your back!" Light said, poking it's eyes.

"Hey, let's kill the Belly Bangers!" Light added.

"DATA DRAIN!" L yelled sticking out his I-phone and pointing it at the Belly Bangers. He shook it.

"Dang it! I-phones can do everything… except Data Drain. YOU'VE BETRAYED ME, APPLE INC." L yelled, throwing an apple at a wall. Apple juice went all over

ALL OVER

All over the wall!

_Larry's turn…_

"!" Larry yelled, charging. One of the Belly Bangers' fat jiggled.

_Light's turn…_

"Moon Tiara Strike!" Light yelled, suddenly having a tiara on his head. He threw it at a Belly Banger. It bounced off his belly and came back, hitting Light in the face.

"Sit on them!" The chief Belly Banger commanded.

"Don't let them get away!" Another said.

"Hey, I found my penis!" One in the back yelled in a sing-song voice. They all ran… or wobbled… whichever floats your boat… toward the three heroes and tackled

TACKLED

Tackled them.

"Let's get this over with…" Light said.

_6 minutes later…_

"You've… been belly banged!" The chief said.

"Autobots, roll out!" The chief added. Literally rolling out the door, with exhaust coming out of their butts.

Degraded, Light, L, and Larry walked to the counter.

"Can we rent a spaceship?" Light asked.

"Sure." Joey Wheeler said from behind the counter, with a new york accent.

The three dramatically pimp walked to the space ship garage. Luke Skywalker was climbing up a ladder to their spaceship! They ran over and shook the ladder, causing Luke to fall and break his leg.

"Shut up and get in the van! And don't ask questions!" Light yelled, in a black-fat-guy-at-McDonalds voice.

"Why should I?" Luke asked in the voice of Pierce Bronsan.

"There's candy involved!" Light said, with L's eyes widening behind him.

"Oh, boy, KAH-NDAY!" Luke said happily, they shoved him into a car ship and slammed the door. The Belly Bangers were inside, waiting.

"We got candy… IN SAUCE FORM!" The captain said. From the ouside, you could hear a sexy schoolgirl screaming and the windows of the ship suddenly covered in chocolate sauce.

"I hear a sexy schoolgirl!" Light exclaimed, zipping down his pant zippers, and jumping head first out of the ship. When he hit the ground he started doing the worm towards the car.

"It's not a sexy girl… IT'S A SEXY MAN!" Light exclaimed, moving his head forward and back saying. "Giggity Giggity-Goo!" (He is not gay you fags! He's just going through a want phase.)

The trio climbed into their sausage-ketchup powered spaceship they rented, with Lord of the Rings music playing in the background. You know, the part where they're climbing the big snowy mountain. They closed the door behind them.

The inside was empty except for an arcade machine with the game Asteroids.

"That must be the control panel!" L exclaimed. He ran over to it.

"Anyone got a quarter?" He asked. Larry handed on to him. "Thanks." L said. He popped it into the coin slot.

A big gothic font A appeared on the screen.

"Welcome to Asteroids, game of the future!" A computerized voice said. The copyright date was 1960.

_6 hours later…_

"This is so intense! My score is already 7,000,000!" L said, eyes bloodshot.

"That says 7. Those zeros are just spots you're seeing, because you haven't blinked since you started." Light pointed out. The lights went red along with L's pupils.

_"This is just a game? No… they lie… it burns us…" _L thought.

"FINISH HIM!" The game screamed as there was only one asteroid left. L controlled the triangle ship and chased the final asteroid. He flew to the bottom of the screen.

"Limit break!" L screamed as he charged a huge laser in the triangle.

"EXODIA, OBLITERATE!" L yelled throwing 5 pieces of plastic with pictures on them at the screen. A huge laser blasted from the triangle, destroying the asteroid. Different color lights flashed from the screen. Everyone's pupils widened as they stared at the screen. They all fell down, having a seizure. Suddenly a disco ball sprouts out of the ceiling. Music came from the walls, playing… You know that Tom Jones song that Carlton always listen to on the Fresh Prince of Bel-air? Well, that's what came out of the wall!

"It's not unusual to have fun at any time!" Light sand along while having a seizure. After they stood back up from their little "episode", They walked over to the machine.

"Are we on the Death Star?" Light asked.

"No," L said. "But we got pancakes!" He exclaimed, pulling a plate of pancakes out of the coin slot. "It's our reward for getting 7 points!" He added.

"Sweeeeet!" Light said. He pulled a bottle of syrup out of his bra. "Let's eat!" Light said.

_4 minutes later…_

"Go! Go! Go! Go!" L cheered, moving his fist up and down.

"!" Larry cheered.

Light was pouring milk on his pancake covered hair, eating it with a spoon.

"So, how do we get to the Death Star?" Light asked.

"Oh that's easy!" L said, kicking the arcade machine out of the way. "We use the control panel!" He added, pointing at a computer that was behind the arcade machine.

"How do we operate the queer machine?" Light asked. Larry walked over to it and pressed random buttons and moving random joy dicks… I mean joy sticks.

_2 seconds later…_

"Is this the Death Star?" Light asked.

"Let's see… Nope, this is 4112 Moonson way. We need to go across the street." L explained, flying the ship away from the starfox. They flew about 10 feet away from it and arrived at the Death Star. It was made out of Belgium Waffles

BELGIUM WAFFLES

Belgium Waffles, and it was dripping syrup.

"AFTER IT!" Light screamed, spitting a tooth at the control panel. (The song like an angry woman from the Grimm Adventures of Billy & Mandy.) They chased that ship. They chased that ship like an angry woman! That ship flew off like an angry woman! Light bit his nails in fear like an angry woman! L sucked that pickle with pleasure like an angry woman! (Still singing: L looked around for the voice and slowly put the pickle down.) Larry pushed the buttons down like an angry woman! He twisted the joystick round'n round like an angry woman! Yeah… like an angry woman…

They chased it for a good, oh, I don't know, about 2 hours. They flew over some planet , over a few galaxies. As they flew, the Death Star dropped syrup on one of the planets, engulfing it in it's sweet maple goodness. But, the heavenly taste was too heavy for the planet! It sank, and fell to the sun, burning up. A narrator suddenly appeared.

"There may be more syrup in your water than you think. That's why you need the Brita Pitcher." He said.

* * *

Misa was still at the mall, eating tuna out of a can. 

"Yeah, do it slower. That's right, slower, yeah, stick it in your nose!" The cameraman said.

"Who are you?" Misa asked in between bites.

"Yo mamma, who are you?" The guy asked.

"……" Misa paused. "I… am…" She said, raising her head dramatically.

"A CHILD PORNSTAR!" She yelled. The extreme pressure from her yell dramatically and slowly pushed the cameraman and all the objects in the room out the door.

* * *

"This isn't a Christmas story anymore!" L exclaimed. It's just random crap put together on a paper with Elmer's glue with some back ground music… that the people can't even hear!" L complained…. Like an angry woman.

* * *

"The Death Star… it's heading… toward… the wall of the universe!" Light said. 

"FULL FUCKING SPEED!" L yelled pointing out the window. They chased after the Death Star until it smashed into the Universe Wall. The three valiant heroes parked their ship on the rubble ignoring the "NO PARKING" sign.

"Alright, son-uv-ah-bitch, Arrekasu, come on out and show us your balls!" L screamed, waving his arms in circles above his head.

"Balls?" Light asked.

"I mean to come out and be a real man in PMS, not a coward!" L said.

Light sneezed out of no where.

"What the hell was that?" L asked.

"I gots da snniffies!" Light said.

* * *

"So who's gonna fight me?" Arrekasu asked. 

"L?" Gyaretto said.

"No."

"Light?"

"No!"

"Larry?"

"Nope!"

"Tickle-me-elmo?"

"Nah, maybe tomorrow."

"Yugi?"

"No."

"Seto Kaiba?"

"Nah."

"Shugo?"

"Oh it's on now!" Arrekasu screamed.

* * *

_7 and a half minutes later…_

L, Light'n, Larry was standing in the spot they arrived in, they waited… like an angry woman. Before long, a platform arose from the rubble.

"It was Gyaretto and Arrekasu with Pokemon battle music playing. They had their fist up about to do fisticuffs.

"Hey, I thunk we wuz gonna fight him!" L said.

"Well, I was gonna fight Shugo… but he is at home playing World of Warhack." Arrekasu said.

"So I popped up and decided to punch him out!" Gyaretto said.

_5 hours later…_

The two idiots were still standing there. The rock-n-roll band playing the Pokemon battle music was dying. Only 2 remained. The music was incredibly Largo.

"Spirit gun!" Arrekasu yelled, putting his hand in the shape of a gun. A blue ball of poorly animated energy blasted from his finger tip. It grew smaller as it flew, until it was nothing! It missed! Gyaretto shrugged.

"FIST OF THE NOSE HAIR!" Gyaretto yelled, with hair shooting out of his eyeballs. The extreme-burning hot hair punched Arrekasu in the face, Arrekasu fell over onto his back.

"Sekai wo, bitch!" Gyaretto said, shaking his head back and fourth.

"Hey, that is my catchphrase!" Light yelled.

"Shut up!" Gyaretto yelled flying away into space.

"Well… let's go home…" L said.

"Wait… L… I… am… your…" Arrekasu started to say, pow pow pow pow pow! L shot the man to death with his I-Gun.

"I was going to say your father!" Arrekasu yelled, writhing in agony on the ground.

"Oh, I thought you were going to say my Michael Jackson!" L said. A narrator appeared on the screen.

"Life comes at you fast. That's why you need space ship insurance." The narrator said, fading into the world of the unknown.

* * *

_So, the mystery of who killed Mr. Burns… I mean… Who killed Ms. Claus is solved, by L, Light'n, Larry!_

_So, for Christmas, L was given a bottle of Gatorade. Light was given a bucket of water, but his parents had to sell the bucket for gas money. Larry got nothing, as usual. Someday, he will get his revenge! _

* * *

**Wolflink93: I'm here so to say sorry for being so late on this chapter I, myself, and me have wrote bonus content for The Death before Christmas. It's called Dear Santa it is a story of when Light tries to make a letter to santa.**

**Renodin: Yeah and since it is past Christmas this wasn't really much of a Christmas story. Well Merry late Holidays and New years.**

**Wolflink93: On to the bonus content! And also… REVIEW! Please. There I said it. happy. Also don't forget to check out my amv Colors of the Death note the link is in my profile. Also check out our poll. Based on our stories who's your favorite character? Vote now in my profiel.**


	6. Bonus Chapter: Dear, Santa

**The Death before Christmas**

**Bonus Chapter: Dear, Santa**

**Basinga Productions**

**Disclaimer: I don't own Death Note. But I do own a bucket of water. **

* * *

_1 week before Ms. Clause incident…_

Light was walking home from school that day with three guys following him saying "There was a woman walking down the street saying Ditty-Ditty Ditty-Domb Ditty-Do!" While pointing at Light.

"Leave me alone just because I have long hair doesn't make me a woman!" Light said in a nasally voice, while chewing on a grapefruit.

Light gave them twenty dollars when they got to his house saying "Thanks for hanging out with me!"

"Whatever loser!" The lead singer said, punching Light in the face, and walking off with the other singers, snapping their fingers in a cool fashion.

Light walked into his house to find his mom on the floor in an Apple costume having a hard time getting up.

"Can you help me up Light?" His mom asked.

"**NO!**" Light said, kicking his mom into a table squirting apple juice everywhere.

"Light since you broke my clothes I need you to go pick up my laundry." His mom said licking the apple juice off the floor.

"WHORE!" Light exclaimed, walking out to pick up the laundry

* * *

He walked into the cleaners called Britches and Hose, and went up to the guy behind the counter. He was Mexican with a unibrow and a mole on the side of his face.

"Hola what me do for you?" The guy said.

"I'm here to pick up my mom's laundry." Light said.

"That be $19.75." The guy said.

Light handed him twenty dollars.

"You're change is two five." The guy said, handing Light ten dollars. Light shrugs and walks out the door. As soon as he did, the mole on the guy's face exploded and it went all over… ALL OVER… all over the store. Light started walking down the street when suddenly a tiny caterpillar shoots out of a nearby tree and starts attacking Light. The scene changed and Pokemon battle music started playing.

* * *

_1 hour later…_

Light slammed open the door to his house breathing heavily, looking battered and beat up with a squirmming caterpillar in his hand, he throws the caterpillar at the wall which left a green spot on the wall, which melted through the wall.

"Thanks Light, were you pwned by a caterpillar." Light's mom said, as he handed the bag to her. She then reaches her hand down into the bag and with a happy face pulls out a… jar of peanut butter.

"You're kidding! I risked my _life _just to get you a jar of pan peanut butter. I hope you get leukemia!" Light screamed. But his efforts were futile because she was rubbing the peanut butter all over… ALL OVER… all over her body. While she was doing that Light started to think.

_Isn't it one week before Christmas I need to write a letter to Santa. And I need to get some Lucky Charms._

Light then proceeded to go up the stairs to the bathroom but when he got there he sees Soichiro dressed in a fortune cookie costume, throwing olives at the door.

"Dad, why are you throwing olives at the door?" Light asked, putting a finger in his nostril.

"I'm cleansing this door." Soichiro answered squinting his eyes, squatting, and moving his hands near the door like he was a mime making an invisible wall.

"Why, and also why does it look like your constipated?" Light asked.

"Believe me you don't want to know." Soichiro said, walking away but only to be pushed down the stairs by Light. When Soichiro fell cookie crumbs went everywhere, and there was a big piece of paper right next to Soichiro that read: Be aware of kids that push people down the stairs after you cleanse a door with olives.

"Sorry force of habit!" Light screamed down to his disfigured dad. Light then walked into the bathroom, closing the door, and putting a sign on the door knob that said sorry busy, it had a stick figure picture of a man raping a woman.

_Good no one can see me now._ Light thought as he slowly moved his hand down to his pants and… pulled up his… zipper. _God that's been bothering me all day _Light thought relieved. Light then turned the knob on the faucet and a pen erected from it. He pulled it out and went into the kitchen for some Lucky Charms. Light opened the refrigerator and just when he was about to grab the Lucky charms… Lucky came and stole the box.

"You'll never get your hands on _my_ Lucky Charms" Lucky said, in his Irish accent. But before Lucky could get away Light shot him.

"I steal a box of cereal and you shoot me in the back!" Lucky was able to scream before he died.

"Damn you Lucky I told you not to come back, and that goes for you rabbit, remember, Trix are for kids!" Light said taking the box from Lucky's limp hands, and threatening Trix the rabbit who was about to take a box of Trix from Light's refrigerator. Light squinted his eyes. Trix took one look and walked off ashamed of himself.

"Damn it, no Lucky Charms. Its bone dry." Light said tapping the box.

"I always thought Lucky Charms were satanic, with their putting a diagram of the powers of the marshmallows on the back of the cereal boxes. I swear Kellog's is trying to rule the world with delicious cereal." Light added.

Light then walked up to his room and got a notebook out from under his bed next to a stack of Victoria Secret magazines.

"I'm gonna write a letter to Santa!" Light screamed moving his head in a circle.

* * *

"Deal or you get somewhat sexually abused." The announcer from deal or no deal said to L. The Belly Bangers were right behind L, waiting for him to decide.

"Deal!" L said sweating, and then a nude guy came running across the screen screaming "JaaAaaAaAam!"

"Okay let's see what you won." The announcer said, after he said that a fat lady dressed in a bikini, holding a brief case, opened it to reveal a piece of paper that said… "You're gonna get somewhat sexually abused."

"Damn it!" L said looking back at the Belly Bangers only to get a face full of chocolate sauce.

* * *

"Whoa, L's on T.V.!" Light exclaimed looking at the T.V. from his desk. "Awwww L's got some new friends. He's gonna have to let me meet them sometime!" Light added. Just as he was about to look back at his notebook, a gust of wind suddenly shoots out of nowhere.

"Is anyone there?" Light said scarred.

"Nope." A voice said.

"Okay." Light said returning his attention back to the notebook. And then Light began to write (Wow I'm a poet and I don't even know it)_I'm gonna need to persuade Santa that I've been a good boy this year. _Light thought starting to write.

Dear, Santa

(When he wrote Santa he pictured him in his mind with a mole on the side of his face)

Now some people may think a bad child is somebody who at Thanksgiving fills a bowl full of gravy and throws it at poor people, or somebody who throws kittens at a puppy, or makes prank phone calls to there Aunt Gill, or maybe someone who stomps on bunnies with their high-heels. All I have to say to that statement is that's a L.I.E. (Loser In Europe). So Santa find it in your heart to give me expensive gifts.

The reason I should get expensive gifts for no price is… I have your family, St. Nickelodeon! So you better give me presents! And I hope you have a very Merry Christmas. I'll remind you again. Give me those presents, because I got your fat wife, fat ass!

So the point I'm trying to make is. You can still get expensive gifts even if you've been bad, because you can still get presents if you do more bad stuff that requires you to fly to the North Pole on a jet plane full of cottage cheese going into a workshop and then secretly and stealthily kidnap someone's family by replacing them with cardboard cut-outs.

Sincerely, with love and care

Yagami, Light

P.S. I want a pony!

P.S.S. And don't give me coal this time, remember I have your family

P.S.S.S. You're fat

"Well that should do it." Light said opening a door in his floor where he yelled.

"Hey Ms. Clause you alright?" All he got in reply were muffled screams.

"Shut up!" He said, throwing an orange slice at her forehead. It looked like her forehead was smiling.

"Awwww your forehead's happy." Light said, as if he just saw a puppy throw up little heart shaped banana bread. When he was about to look back at his notebook there was another gust of wind.

"Is anybody their?" Light asked.

"**NO DAMN IT!!!**" The voice answered.

"Well… let's watch some T.V." Light said grabbing the remote and turning it to the news channel for reasons that not even he could explain._It's almost like some kind of being is controlling me that I don't even know about._ Light thought suspiciously as a sexy schoolgirl came on the screen.

"We have breaking news it seems that Santa Clause has died… yeah… we bring you to news reporter Josh Ben." The scene changed to what looked like to be a workshop in the North Pole, with an acne ridden teenager in the middle of the screen who we now know as Josh Ben, with tuna fish earrings.

"Yes it seems that Santa has died of food poisoning, here is the clip." Josh said as a clip started to play. It showed Santa on a recliner drinking beer and watching T.V. When suddenly Santa stopped drinking, he then broke the bottle of beer and proceeded to chew on the glass he laughed maniacally and then fell down… dead. After five minutes it showed Santa's mole popping and it going all over… ALL OVER… all over the camera screen obscuring the view.

"Scientist have concluded that T.V. was to blame. Back to you." Josh said as he was tackled by a walrus, the scene changed to the sexy schoolgirl.

"Well on lighter news a gang of roaming teenagers decided to go for a swim in a swimming pool full of micro waved baked beans for swim in food day." The reporter said like a sexy schoolgirl.

"There were no survivors." The sexy schoolgirl added with a solemn expression.

Light was lying on the floor twitching, and drooling as if his manhood had just been taken away. Then Light stood up, zipped up his pants, and walked over to get his notebook and trash it since Santa was dead. When he got there all he saw was empty space.

* * *

"Thanks for helping me W-dog, and what not!" Ryuk said laughing

"It was nothing man anything to help out one of my homies." W-dog said as he and Ryuk did the Will Smith high five as soon as they did that, 100 miles away in Canada a child went hungry.

Ryuk was sitting cross-legged on a roof of a house near Light's, chuckling, and looking at a page of the Death Paper which read: The human whose name is written within these sheets of paper shall die… or at least we think they will. Then Ryuk turned to the next page which read: You must have the person's face in mind when writing there name so people with the same name will not be affected. Then Ryuk turned another page: If a cause of death is not written within 40 seconds of writing the person's name then they shall die of food poisoning. Then Ryuk turned another page it read: George W. Bush was dropped on his head as a baby. Ryuk turned another page, at the top of the paper read…

Dear, Santa

* * *

**Wolflink93: Well this was all written by me so I hoped you guys like it I know it probably not as funny as our other chapters, and also this is an apology to say how sorry we are for not finishing the story in time. And well I thought this up when I had to do a persuasive Essay in English class about persuading Santa that you've been good. I got a B on it because it was and I quote "Supposed to persuade him that you've been good not that you can get presents." Well hopefully you're comments will be good and please review I want to see if I did good on this story**

**Light: Sniff you made me kill Santa.**

**Wolflink93: Shut up and get back down in the basement with Ms. Clause.**

**Light: Yes sir.**


	7. The Mayonaise Theft Part 1

**The Mayonnaise Theft**

**Part 1**

**Written by Wolflink93**

**A Basinga Productions**

**Disclaimer: I don't own Death Note but I do own a sack of crap. **

* * *

It was 12:00 A.M. on February 2, 2008 and all was quiet except for the Yagami house hold.

"Who are you!?" The voice of Light's mom screamed.

"Get her!" A mysterious voice screamed, followed by a grunt from another person.

"Get the mayonnaise!" Mysterious voice commanded. You could hear glass bottles clang together as if somebody was rummaging through a refrigerator.

"Who are you!?" Light's mom screamed.

"That's classified." Mysterious voice said.

"Why are you here?"

"That's classified."

"Why are you after my mayonnaise?"

"That's classified."

"Do you serve refreshments?"

"She knows to much, get her!" The mysterious voice commanded running out of the Yagami house hold, followed by a big bulky man carrying Light's mom, toward the Weiner Mobile. After getting in the Weiner Mobile they started it with ketchup fumes coming out of the exhaust pipe then driving off into the sun rise.

* * *

_Meanwhile a thousand miles away… I mean about 10 feet away in Light's room…_

Through all the commotion Light was still sleeping.

"Can you pass the Grey Poupon?" Light mumbled in his sleep, suddenly having a happy smile on his face. Then suddenly a mysterious figured creped open the door slowly (Oh so slowly) and tip-toed next to Light's bed, holding what appeared to be a KNIFE! The figure lifted up the object and slammed it down onto Light's chest.

"I found a……… CARROT!" The figure said, repeatedly slamming what is now a carrot into Light's chest.

"What in the land of Cheese Nips are you doing, L?" Light screamed.

"I wanted to show you this cool carrot I found lying in the street." L said, while still slamming Light in the chest with the carrot.

"It is pretty cool." Light mumbled, watching the carrot slam into his chest.

"Hey did your family have one of those "conversations" again?" L asked, making air quotes on the word conversation.

"No, why?" Light asked, confused

"Because your kitchen is destroyed. I think that this would have to have been a very big "conversation"." L answered. Light hopped out of bed and ran down the stairs to the kitchen, with L stabbing him in the back with the carrot.

When they both got there they could see that the kitchen was a mess just like L said. There was a puddle of mustard on the ground, the windows in the kitchen were also broken, and for some odd reason the dishes that were sitting in sick water are on fire. L saw something out of the corner of his eye and went over to investigate.

"What the chicken poppers is this?" L said, picking up a book that had letters written on the cover that said Jewish Bible with an X over it. L then saw another object next to it and picked it up. A window appeared below L that read: Congratulations you found a box of twinkies… Well… Here you go… Fatty! L then walked back over to Light.

"Light, I didn't know you hated Jews." L said, holding up the bible. "Or that you had an inner phrat boy." L said, holding up the box of twinkies.

"Those aren't mine." Light said.

"Then whose are these?" L screamed, shaking the objects in front of Light's face.

"My next door neighbor Joe?" Light said, shrugging. When Light said that a hairy man pooped out of the garbage disposal.

"There was a woman walking down the street saying Ditty-Ditty Ditty-Domb Ditty-Do." The leader of the Ditty-Domb gang sang, while pointing at Light.

"Leave me alone! Just because I have long hair doesn't make me a woman!" Light exclaimed in a nasally voice while chewing on a grapefruit.

* * *

_Mayor's office…_

The sun rose slowly illuminating the mayor's office with a bright magenta. There was a figure looking out the window.

"What a beautiful sun rise." The figure said, sighing. BAM! The door to the mayor's office slammed open to reveal a man covered in ketchup.

"Mayor Chikenfeathers, the town is low on mayonnaise!" The secretary screamed. "It seems that somebody has been stealing from the town's mayonnaise factory by replacing the jar's of mayonnaise with card board cut-outs." The secretary added.

"What!?" The mayor exclaimed, while turning around. The mayor was a greasy fat guy in a chicken costume. "Our best selling condiment is mayonnaise." Mayor Chickenfeathers stated.

"I know sir this morning I had to substitute mayonnaise with ketchup. Who are we going to call?"

"The Ghost Bust… I mean the L team!"

"I'll get right on it sir." The secretary said, saluting, and then running out of the door to call the L team leaving a trail of ketchup behind.

* * *

_Light's house…_

"Now, tell me sir did this jar of mayonnaise have any enemies?" The po-po officer said, writing something down in his notepad. The po-po officer was talking to a grief stricken Soichiro.

"No… well… I don't knowwwwwww!" Soichiro said, sobbing like a sissy boy.

"What about your wive… Is she cheating on you, has any enemies. And also can I have her number." Soichiro's face suddenly changed from sad to angry.

"Who cares about that bitch! What about my precious mayonnaise!" Soichiro said, angrily.

"Well I thought…" The po-po said, writing something else in the notepad. Soichiro squinted his eyes and yelled.

"Get out of my site!"

"Yes sir!" The po-po said, running off leaving his notebook behind which read:

Chicken

Grease

Salt.

* * *

_Light's room…_

"Captain Crunch!" Light screamed.

"Cocoa puffs!" L screamed. L and Light were both fighting over what should be the best cereal of 2008. But the argument was interrupted as the lump in L's pants started to shake. L immediately put sunglasses on and put his hand down his pants and pulled out his I-phone pressing the talk button on the touch pad.

"This is L, man how can I help you?" L said, in a cool like voice.

"Uh-huh, yup, no, yup, ohhhhhhh yeah, yes I'll take some fries with that shake. Okay, okay, uh-huh, yup, okay, bye." L said, hanging the I-phone up, and stuffing it back down into the depths of his pants. Light just stood there staring at L strangely the whole time.

"WTF was that about." Light asked.

"That was the mayor he wants us to come in to solve a case." L said. Light just looked at L even stranger.

"Okay, but lets pick up Larry on the way." Light said, jumping out of the window in his room without opening it.

* * *

_Several hours later…_

L, Light'n, and Larry were out side the mayor's office. They ran passed the secretary knocking him down in the process and Light kicked down the door. with his kick-the-door-down-like-an-FBI-agent powers.

"!" Larry exclaimed.

"Yes, I am Mayor Chickenfeathers." The mayor said dramatically, turning around in his chair to face them with chickens flying around behind him. "Have a seat." Chickenfeathers said gesturing to the 3 seats in front of him. The seats were covered with red velvet coverings which were also covered with chicken crap. L and Light walked over to the chairs with a happy face and sat down saying.

"Don't mind if we do." When they sat down you could an indistinct squishing noice. Larry seemed to hesitate but then walked over and sat down saying.

"?"

"Yes, Larry you are here to solve a case." Chickenfeathers said. After he said that his secretary ran in with a TV set and gave the remote to the mayor. "You see our town is now on a mayonnaise shortage."

"So." L said.

"Well, mayonnaise is where most of the money comes from for the city. Let me show you this clip so you will have a better understanding. Chickenfeathers pressed the play button as a clip started to roll on the TV screen.

_TV screen…_

"Bill! Bill! Bill! Bill! Bill! Bill! Bill Nye the Science Guy!" Some guys chanted. Bill Nye then appeared on the screen.

"Did you know that 80 percent of the world's economy comes from the sales of mayonnaise?" Bill asked.

_Real world…_

When Bill said that L, Light'n, Larry shook there heads no as if in a trance.

_TV screen…_

Bill started to go through a building which was having a gang war.

"You see mayonnaise used to be used as _Bang! _flavoring for food. But people found_Bang! _Other ways to use it by rubbing it all over… ALL _Bang!_ OVER… all over there body's" Bill said, holding up a gun to shoot a guy. When he shot the guy a loud _BILL! _Escaped from the gun creating a powerful sound wave that was able to kill the gang member. Then the scene suddenly changed to Bill swimming in a pool full of mayonnaise doing the breast stroke.

"You see if a town's mayonnaise was well I don't know… stolen then there economy will fall with fat guys roaming the town in search for a favorable condiment. Normally they reduce themselves to blood." Bill explained. Then the scene changed to Bill taking slow and big bites of a Big Mac layered with mayonnaise and extra cheese. When he took a fifth bite the colors inverted as the big mac suddenly exploded, obscuring the camera view.

_Real world…_

L, Light'n, Larry just sat that there as if they just discovered the secret of the universe.

"Well that's pretty much everything in a nutshell." The mayor said.

"NUTS!" L exclaimed out of nowhere quickly covering his mouth.

"?" Larry asked.

"Yes, I want you to find the person guilty of this. You will also have someone tag along."

"Who?" Light asked.

"Chester… CHETAH!" Mayor Chickenfeathers screamed, with the lights turning red, and chickens flying every which way making _PA-CAKING_ noises. After the mayor said that a 6 foot tall orange cheetah stepped out of the shadows, wearing sunglasses, a detective overcoat and hat, he also had spots all over his body and tail.

"Who's ready to get…" Chester began to say. "CHEEZY!" Chester finished saying, sniffing cheese crumbs in his nose.

"Isn't it kind of dangerous to eat cheese like that?" Light asked.

"Are you stepping in my corn flakes. Cause let me tell you something about stepping in someone else's corn flakes." Chester said, moving his face right in front of Light's. "It's a weird way to eat corn flakes." Chester said, dramatically.

"Well now we're all done that's done. Go L team! And save the day." The mayor said, kicking them out of the door into the streets.

"When did we become the L team?" Light asked.

"Well ever since that Ms. Clause case that we solved we've been recognized as real detectives with super skillz." L explained.

"Well, let's go solve this case bitches!" Chester screamed walking off with his overcoat blowing in the wind even though there wasn't one blowing. L, Light'n, Larry followed and that was the beginning of the long journey to gahter the Tri-force… I mean mayonnaise.

_To be continued… _

* * *

**Wolflink93: Here you go people this again was written by me. And also I have some breaking news me and Renodin are going to do a Valentine's/ Birthday special. Cause guess what February 28****th**** is Light's birthday. That is if you already didn't know. So be on the look out for that and also I will be writing more of this story. So, sayonara. AND REVIEW please. **


	8. Another One Rides the Bus

**

* * *

**

Another One Rides the Bus

**Basinga Production**

**Myth Labs Productions**

**Written by Renodin & Wolflink93**

**Disclaimer: We do not own Death Note but we DO own a restaurant you've never heard of.**

* * *

"I'm gonna be the pirate king!" the guy on the TV said.

"Nuh-uh! No you isn't!" The TV said on a different channel as Light quickly turned to the Cosby Show. He flipped the channel again.

"How many balls can you stuff in your mouth?" The TV announcer asked. Light changed it to the Spongebob Movie.

"12." Some guy said.

"IN YOUR FACE!" Spongebob screamed.

"We interrupt this fag-bag to bring you a special announcement!" Some sexy schoolgirl said.

"SUNDAY SUNDAY SUNDAY!" A guy shouted in a deep, raspy, voice.

"Today's Sunday!" Light said in a nasally accent.

"Come to the monster truck rally! We got popcorn, cake, and

ICE CREAM!

That's right, I said

ICE CREAM!

We don't have many monster trucks but we do have

ICE CREAM!

I scream for

ICE CREAM!" The announcer repeated over and over and over. The screen switched to some little fat kid sitting on the porch of a gas station. He had a tub of ice cream, and a spoonful of it. He was slowly pushing the huge heaping spoonful of it into his mouth, with chunks of it sticking to his face and falling off. It was replayed 6 times, on the 3rd time going in slow motion, and on the 5th time, the colors were inverted. Then, the screen went black, for about 5 seconds. Suddenly, there was a bathtub of ice cream the announcer was spinning around the screen in the tub.

"ICE CREAM!" The announcer yelled one last time. Then, finally the TV exploded.

"I GOTTA GO TO THE MONSTER TRUCK RALLY! But first, I gotta call some friends." Light said. Light goes up to his phone and picks up the banana shaped phone, presses some numbers and stands there waiting for them to answer.

_In the house where Light is calling…_

You can see a phone ringing with the ring tone sounding like this.

"Ditty-Ditty Ditty-Domb Ditty-Do!" The lead singer walks over to the phone and picks it up saying.

"Ditty-Ditty this is the Ditty-Ditty Ditty-Domb Ditty-Do residence."

_Light's house…_

"Hello Mr. Ditty-Ditty Ditty-Domb Ditty-Do would you and your Ditty-Domb gang want to hang out with me at the MONSTER TRUCK RALLY!" Light says to DDDDDD

_DDDDDD house…_

"There was a woman walking down the street saying Ditty-Ditty Ditty-Domb Ditty-Do!" The lead singer sang pointing at the phone.

_Light's house_…

"But… But… But… I love you!" Soichiro said to a dolphin, that was swimming in the bath tub full of vegetable oil. Soichiro was wearing a cheese costume. The dolphin just sat there… dead in the pool of oil.

"How could you, Soichiro!" Light's mom said, standing in the doorway in a baloney costume, shocked.

"I can explain!" Soichiro said, holding out his hand almost as if to tell her to stop. But really he was just checking the back of his hand for scratches. With a wail of distress Light's mom ran out.

"This is bull shit!" Soichiro yelled. "I get in trouble because the dolphin died a little too soon. Damn I was looking forward to those dolphin fries to." Soichiro added

_Light's kitchen…_

"Leave me alone, just because I have long hair doesn't make me a woman." Light said, in a nasally voice while chewing on a grape fruit. Light was putting the phone down while rapping music played. Light shook his head up and down while the music played. But stops himself when he's 1 cm away from hanging up, he immediately pulls the phone to his face and screams.

"Sekai wo bitch!" Light yelled. "Ditty-Ditty Ditty-Domb Ditty-Do!" Light added, slamming the phone… accidentally toward his face.

"Damn it! stupid twitchitus!" Light screamed making a grunt. Light then slammed the phone, the right way this time.

"Damn that sucks. Maybe L can come!" He exclaimed, pushing the randomly placed "Call for sex" button.

L heard his phone ring the theme song to his hit TV show, "L's Pleasure Time." He flipped open his phone.

"Heeeeyyyy, wassup Mr. Lesbian Dolphin?" L asked.

"Hey, L, wanna go to the MONSTER TRUCK RALLY?! They have popcorn, cake, and

ICE CREAM! I know how much you like cake and

ICE CREAM!" Light exclaimed, sounding just like the guy from the Cosby Show… I mean the Monster Truck Commercial.

"I can't make it. I'm solving a very important case."

"What kind of case?" Light asked.

"The kind where you have to have sex with this one girl to unlock the book of Giggidy."

"Isn't that just a rip off of the Muppets in Space?"

"……..Yeah…… bye…" L said. He hung up the phone and threw it into the audience. L was performing the famous play Famous Play. L was sitting behind a desk that went up to his neck so you couldn't see his body. He was wearing a detective's hat on his head.

"It's not safe here let's take it to the library. We can do it on a shelf." L said.

"No!" The girl said, running off of the stage only to fall on a pile of chimichungas.

"Where the hell did those come from?" L said, confused and angry that he wouldn't get boned. (In front of a live studio audience.) "And what the hell are chimichungas?" L added. He shrugged and walked out from behind the desk. He was wearing what appeared to be a pink, frilly, ballerina costume. He then proceeded to slowly tip toe out of the scene with his hands above his head to create a half circle. While the background music for the plum fairy played.

Light closed the phone. He looked down, and after about 5 seconds, he snapped.

"DAMN IT! ALL THESE FOOS ARE ALL TOO BUSY SUCKING BROOMS TO GO TO THE MONSTER TRUCK RALLY!" Light exclaimed. Light's mom emerged into the room.

"Sucking Brooms?" She asked. Light's sister came in.

"Brooms?" She asked. Rey's future fiancé came into the room.

"Sucking?" She asked. Misa the child porn star emerged from under Light's bed.

"Orly?" She asked in a gay voice.

"What the hell are you guys doing here?" Light asked, emphasis on the word hell. They all quickly jumped out the door.

"Yeah, that's what I thought." Light said, smirking. He unfolded the phone. He pushed the "Confession" button on his phone.

Inside the dumpster behind Reasol's all was quiet, when suddenly, the song _Can't touch this_ started to play. Suddenly, a cell phone came out of nowhere! It flipped open.

"?" Larry said.

"Heeeyyyyyyyyyyyyy Larryyyyy!" Wanna come to the Monster truck rally with me?" Light asked.

"…" Larry explained.

"Damn, that sucks brooms. Well, I'll see you later." Light said, hanging up. Larry hung up and threw the phone down. Suddenly Misa was lying down in the dumpster.

"Give it to me straight, Larry!" Misa said. Suddenly, there was a strange noise, like that of grabbing your cheek and shaking it. A strange fluid began to flow toward Misa's face. The scene was then enlarged to show that Larry was squeezing mayo onto Misa's face.

* * *

"That… bitch… still… owes… me… 7.50!" The guy at the cash register, who worked at the cash register, screamed. When he did that, all of the fat, greasy, slobs in the room looked at him from their triple-patty-melts… with extra cheese.

"What you lookin' at?" The dude asked, poking one of the near by fat guys. He shouldn't have done that. It was a BELLY BANGER! As the Belly Banger's fat jiggled. The Belly Banger immediately put on an angry face as Heavy Metal music played.

"Belly Roll!" The Belly Banger said, pulling a glob of his fat off. He threw it at the horny guy.

"Mac Attack!" The horn guy said, pulling out a big mac, with extra cheese, from his pocket and throwing it at the fat roll. The two objects collided in mid-air and as they collided there was a big explosion that shook the world.

_Wait I know how to defeat him now!_ The horn guy thought. He then threw one of his Macs toward the ground making a hill.

"No! My only weakness!" The Belly Banger said as he rolled down the hill toward a woman's foot locker. Somehow he was able to fit in it. The horn guy slammed the door shut once he threw a barrel of kiwis in the locker.

"You've been Mack Attacked!" The horn guy said sexily to a guy who was passing by, who just gave him a strange look in return.

* * *

"What now? Do I go to the Monster Truck Rally by myself?" Light asked himself.

"Sure, why not?" Paul McCartney said as he just so happened to be in Light's closet.

"All right, it's a date!" Light yelled.

"With who?" Paul asked.

"uhhh…. My imaginary friend." Larry said.

"No, he's in the dumpster behind Reasol's having fun with Misa." Paul said.

"That's my future girlfriend!" Light exclaimed.

L was taking a break from his 'case' and walking down the overly crowded, favorite hangout among teens, the alley behind Reasol's. L heard something in the dumpster. The dumpster was shaking, and rattling.

"What da hell…?" L said, licking a lollipop. He put his ear up to the dumpster to listen. There was a loud beating noise, like that of beating your palm on a desk. Suddenly it stopped.

"No, get away from me!" The voice of Misa said inside the dumpster.

"!!" Larry screamed, in a horny accent.

"Translation; Get back here, I ain't done with you!" A gay translator said, from below the dumpster. L slowly opened the lid, with a loud creaking noise. His mouth gaped.

"Larry?! What the hell are you doing here, in the place you were conceived?" L asked. Larry and Misa were fighting over a Big Mac and it was in both of their mouths.

"Come on, Larry, dump that hoe and lets go!" L said, Larry stepped out and they both joined arms and skipped off.

* * *

"Well, I gotta get some change and skido!" Light said. "Well it costs 25 cents to get on, and 30 cents to get off. So I need… 55 cents!" Light exclaimed, running out the door.

"He is soooooo smart!" Paul said, hiding in a coat pocket.

* * *

"You...need a loan... for 55 cents..." The broker said, looking down at a piece of paper neatly filled out by Light for a loan. "For what would you need this 55 cents for?" He said quirking an eyebrow.

"To get on the bus." Light replied simply.

"To where?" The man said.

"Monster Truck Rally..." Light answered. There was a moment of silence as they both stared at each other...

"...okay..."The man said, pulling out two coins. One was a quarter and the other was a quarickle. Which is a quarter and a nickle combined to make thirty cents.

"Sweet!" Light exclaimed, taking the money and leaving. After the kid left the man sighed.

"Good luck kid you're going to need it."

* * *

Light was now standing at a bus stop, waiting for the bus. There was also a guy next to him dressed in a business suit, also waiting. The man kept looking at his watch as if he were in a hurry.

"Come on, come on, come on." The man said, as if he were trying to urge the bus to get there sooner. Then the bus pulled up as if his planned worked.

"Ah." The man said relieved. He then stepped on the bus ,with Light right behind him, depositing a quarter into the slot thingy. Light then went to a seat and sat down next to a guy, who also had a suit on except he had a moustache. The other guy then came in and sat down in the first seat. Then the bus took off with a start. The guy next to Light decided to introduce himself.

"Hello, my name is Captain Larry." The guy said, holding out a hand for Light to shake.

"My name is Light. And I also have an imaginary friend named Larry." Light said, shoving trash from his coat pocket into the man's hand.

"That's a firm peice of trash you got there, sonny." Captain Larry said, squeezing the trash.

"Yeah made it meself." Light proudly said, as the bus stopped. The guy from earlier stood up from the first seat, and went up to the bus driver, digging through his pockets. When the man got to the bus driver, he groaned.

"30 cents please." The bus driver said, looking over toward the man.

"I left my change at home." The guy said.

The bus driver faced forward, and closed the bus doors. "...Then I guess you're going to be late for work." He said, driving off. The guy had a surprised look on his face.

"I was suppose to be given a promotion today..." The guy said, holding his thumb. "But... now... I'll... never... get... PROMOTED!!" The man screamed, squeezing his thumb causing blood to come out of his chest. The blood sprayed everywhere, even in the bus driver's face. But he kept his eyes on the road and didn't flinch. There was now blood everywhere. But, nobody paid any attention. All the bus driver did was get a cloth from out of his pocket, and wiped the blood away. And said as the man died

"Another one bites the dust." The busdriver said, still driving.

"What the hell was up with that?" Light asked the man.

"Oh, we get thems all the time." Captain Larry said.

"Oh..." Light said, looking forward. But then all of a sudden there was an earthquake! Though the bus driver kept on driving, smashing a few cars here and there. Then all of a sudden the quarickle in Light's pants fell out and landed on the floor.

"Opps dropped me 30 cents." Light said, slowly picking it up. But, was stopped when 15 kids tackled it. The kids were biting and punching each other in the facem, to get the coin so they could get off the bus. A kid took the coin and ran up to the bus driver, as he was opening the doors. The kid then gave the coin to the bus driver, and ran off the bus screaming.

"I'm freeeeee!!"

"Shit!" Light exclaimed watching the kid run down the sidewalk. Light then started to panic as the bus was nearing the monster truck rally.

"What the hell am I going to do!" Light said, holding his head in his hands. "Wait, that's it!" Light yelled, looking over toward Captain Larry.

"Do you have 30 cents that you could spare?" Light asked.

"Nope only got enough for meself." Captain Larry answered.

"Darn it! I'll never make it to the Family preview night ice cream social! I mean monster truck rally if I don't get 30 cents!" Light yelled, pulling at his hair. "Wait that's it again!" Light exclaimed, looking over at Captain Larry.

"Hey, do you have a cell phone?" Light asked the man.

"Yes."

"Can I borrow it for a sec?" Light asked politely.

"Sure." Captain Larry said, taking out a razor. "Oh, wait sorry wrong item. Heh heh that's for shaving." Captain Larry said, putting his razor back. "Okay here it is..." He said, pulling out a cricket. "Darn it... that's not it either." Captain Larry said, putting the bug back inside his pocket. "Here we go my... I-Phone!" Captain Larry said, handing it to Light.

"Sweet!" Light exclaimed, grabbing the phone from his clutches. Light then looked at the screen. "Damn it... no bars." Light stated.

"Oh, then you can use my emergency phone." Captain Larry said, pulling out a can with a string attached to it, that leaded outside the bus for miles and miles and miles.

"Thank you." Light said, taking the can, and dialing the only person who he knew could help him.

* * *

L was now back at the theater solving the 'case'. Larry was also there but he was sitting down in the front row watching. Which looked to be the only seat not filled to the blind eye. When all of a sudden a can with string attached to it started rattling, as if there were a penny inside it and someone was shaking it, on a desk near the stage.

"Hold on a second folks." L said, jumping off stage to answer it. "Hello?"

_Yeah I would like to order one double large peperonii pizza with extra onions please. _A guy on the other line said.

"You have the wrong can." L said.

_You mean this isn't Pizza Hut?_ The guy asked, confused.

"Exactly." L said, hanging up the phone. Just as L was about to walk away the can rattled again. L then picked up the can.

"Hello?" L greeted.

_Is this L?_ A voice said, from over the can.

"Light? What the hell do you want?" L asked, confused.

_I can't get off the bus I need you to help me bust out._ Light said. _Right now I'm using someones can, so make it fast before we make it to the monster truck rally._ Light said

"We'll be there!" L said, hanging up with action spy music playing. Then L ripped off his ballerina costume to reveal he had a tuxedo on. Also in the empty seat in the front of the row, you could hear the sound of clothes being ripped off. The can rattled again, with L answering it.

"Hello, you have just won a millon dollars, we'll just need your name and address so we can send it to you." A woman on the other line said cheerfuly.

"I can't right now. I need to help my friend bust out of a bus, by getting him 30 cents." L explained, hanging up.

"You ready Larry!?" L said coolly.

"." Larry said.

"Good, then let's roll!" L commanded, getting into a barrel labeled "L's Barrel" and rolling away, followed by another barrel labeled "Larry's Barrel".

* * *

Soichiro, Soichiro's wife, and Light's sister were all sitting at the table eating lunch. When Light's sister went to reach for the pepper, she accidently bumped into her glass of milk, spilling it.

"Well, no use crying over spilled milk." Light's sister said, getting up to get some towels. When she came back she saw that Soichiro was breathing heavily, with an angry look on his face.

"Don't... you... **ever... talk... about... milk... that way!**" Soichiro yelled, standing up throwing bacon grease in her face.

* * *

It now shows L and Larry, still in the barrels, rolling towards the bus Light was on. Then all of a sudden police sirens were going off.

"Crap! It's the fuzz..." L said, with balls of fuzz following them with sirens on top of them. "Come on Larry let's use the Backwash manuever!" L said, pouring Drain-o out of a hole in the barrel, with Larry doing the same.

"!" Larry yelled.

"No, I don't know where the hell this Drain-o came from!" L yelled back. As the Drain-o hit the fuzz, you could faintly hear a man's voice saying "Drain-ooooooo" in a low pitch voice. The fuzz then started to spin out of a control and hit a wall, causing it to explode.

"Larry, how the hell are we going to dodge that!" L exclaimed.

"?"

"No, I won't do a barrel roll! Do you know how much of a lame joke you just made?" L said.

"..." Larry sadly said.

"Oh, I'm sorry Larry. Here let me give you a hug." L said, running into Larry with the barrel, causing them both to smash open.

"Okay... maybe I shouldn't have done that..." L said, looking forward to see where the bus was. But, it was no where in site. "I guess will have to cut them off." L said. Larry then suddenly pulled out scissors and cut off the pimple on L's face. "No not that! The bus! We need to get ahead so we can ambush it." L explained, slapping the scissors down on the ground.

"!" Larry yelled cheerfuly.

"Yeah, Larry! Lettttttt's goooooooo!" L yelled cheerfuly, making a pose.

"?" Larry asked.

"Why do I keep reapeting everything you're saying?" L responded.

"." Larry said.

"So, the readers can understand what the hell you're saying. After all you are imaginary." L simply stated.

"..." Larry said.

"Shut up! And let's go!" L screamed, in frustration. "We'll worry later about your bleeding arm later!" L added, walking off followed by a bloody trail following him.

* * *

_Back on the bus..._

"Come on, guys where are you." L muttered, looking at a clock on the bus ,that said 24 minutes until they arrive at the monster truck ralley.

"This reminds of the show 24!" Captain Larry said, for no apparent reason.

* * *

_On top of a building... 22 minutes remaining..._

"Okay, Larry we have 22 minutes until the ice cream social... I mean monster truck rally... So, here's the plan. First, we're going to jump off this roof and do a barrel roll into the bus... Then we're going to get in there and give Light this quarickle." L explained, showing Larry the coin.

"That way before he makes it to the monster truck rally. He'll be able to get off. But, then we'll need to make a quick escape before the bus driver notices we're on the bus. So, he doesn't make us stay on too... Got it?" Larry said. With Larry apparently nodding.

* * *

_On the bus... 20 minutes remaining..._

"Um, Captain Larry, who's that fat guy?" Light asked, pointing to a fat guy with no shirt on, sitting in the back seat, with a badge pinned to his skin that said "Bus guard."

"Oh, that's an ex-belly banger." Captain Larry answered. "He was kicked out just because he was too fat." Captain Larry stated.

"A belly banger? There pretty strong. Me, L, and Larry were not able to take them down."

"That's a belly banger for ya. Only a few have the power to defeat them. Though I hear on the streets that the Belly Bangers and The Ditty-Domb Gang, are having a gang war." Captain Larry stated. "I hear it's getting pretty sticky out there." Captain Larry added. Then all of a sudden a blob of fat fell from the Belly Bangers' belly, and started sucking up the gum out from under his seat. He then picked it back up and put it back in his belly. It sent a shiver down Light's spinal cord.

Light then turned to look out the window. He then saw someting. He squinted his eyes to get a better look.

"Is that L... and Larry!?" Light said in surprise.

* * *

_On the roof... 18 minutes later..._

"Ready Larry!" L said, seeing the bus coming their way. Larry nodded. "3...2...1... Jump!" L commanded jumping off the building. Doing a barrel roll, followed by Larry.

"!" Larry exclaimed.

"Yeah, we are going to make it!" L yelled back. Just as they were about to go through the two holes, convientely placed on top of the bus, that were both in the shape of L and Larry's body. The Belly Banger jumped out with heavy metal music playing.

"Belly!" The Belly Banger yelled, with the sound of a gun cocking, followed by the Belly Banger's fat rippling. "Cannon!" The Belly Banger thrusted forward, with a blob of fat shooting out of his belly button, heading straight toward L and Larry.

"Larry! Evasive manuevers!" L commanded, with L sticking out his hands like an airplane, then leaning to the right, making airplane noises, followed by Larry.

"!" Larry yelled.

"We can't use the barrel roll under these conditions. I'm going to need to stun him. So, that way we can dive bomb into the holes that coincidentally are in the shape of us." L yelled over the wind. The Belly Banger was about to reload, until L stopped him by throwing a red spear.

"Licorash Spear!" L yelled, as it hit the Belly Banger, temporarily stunning him. This gave L and Larry the chance to dive bomb into the bus.

* * *

_Inside the bus... 14 minutes remaining..._

"I need to go." Light said.

"Go in the bucket." A guy next to him said, handing him a bucket covered in grafitti.

"Ummmmmm--" Light was about to say something, until he saw L and Larry jump from the roof into the bus. Followed by the Belly Banger.

"I won't let you get away." The Belly Banger said, rolling towards them.

"Light! Evasive manuever XXX ROCK BAND!!" L yelled, looking over toward Light. Light nodded pulling a guitar out of nowhere. L then pulleout a microphone, with Larry on saxophone. Before the Belly Banger could reach them. Light hit him with a guitar to get him away.

"We need our singing space asshole!" Light screamed, with the bus driver not caring and still letting people on.

"1, 2, 3, 4!" L yelled, starting to sing.

"Riding in the bus down the boulevard. And the place was pretty packed. Yeah! Couldn't find a seat so I had to stand. Witht the perverts in the back." L sang, with a lot more people getting on the bus, then the people in the back sudenly put a seductive look on their face, holding up a porn magizine.

"It was smelling like a locker room. There was junk all over the floor. We're already packed in like sardines so we're stopping to pick up more." The bus then stopped again letting more people on, making the Belly Banger sweat for some reason.

"Another one rides the bus! Another one rides the bus! Another comes on and another comes on! Another one rides the bus. Hey he's gonna sit by you." L sang, talking to an old lady, and shaking her when he said the last part. Showing a man behind him who was going to sit there. Who had a mole on the whole left side of his face. "Another one rides the bus!"

"There's a suitcase poking me in the ribs. Theres an elbow in my ear. There's a smelly old bum sitting right next to me, hasn't showered in a year." A suitcase suddenly flew toward the belly banger hitting him in the head. Then an elbow hit him in the ear causing his ear to go red. Then the stench of an old bum, wafted through his nostrils, causing him to regirgitate. Then all of a sudden Light started to do a guitar solo followed by Larry doing his solo.

"I think I'm missing a contact lens. I think my wallets gone. And I think this bus is stopping again to let a couple more freaks get on look out!" L sang.

"I'm missing a contact lens, and my wallets gone. And why is the bus stopping this isn't a bus stop!" The belly banger yelled.

"Another one rides the bus ow. Another one rides the bus hey hey. Another one rides the bus hey-y-y-y-y-yyyyyy!!" L sang.

"The window doesn't open and the fan is broke. And my face is turning a blue (Yeah) I haven't been in a crowd like this. Since I went to see the Who. Well I should have gotten off a couple miles ago. But I couldn't get to the door. There isn't any room for me to breath. And now we're gonna pick up more yeaaaah!" L sang, with the Belly banger chocking.

"Darn it, my only weakness... tight... spaces..." The Belly Banger managed to squeeze out as he died. Followed by Light doing his guitar solo. And Larry suddenly on drums ended it on a loud BAM!

As the song ended the bus driver still didn't notice the fight that was going on. L then took this chance and gave Light the 30 cents.

"Here it is! Now let's go to the monster truck ralley!" L exclaimed.

"!" Larry screamed.

"But, there isn't enough money for you guys to get off." Light stated.

"Yes, there is... I stole the belly banger's wallet." L said proudly. Light then turned towards the dead body.

"Sekai wo bitch!" Light said to the dead corpse.

* * *

_At the monster truck ralley... 0 minutes remaining..._

L, Light'n, Larry, were now at the rally in line to get their ice cream, but when they got there.

"Sorry, we're out of ice cream." The guy at the couter said. Light had a horrified look on his face.

"NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!" L screamed to the sky.

"I knew I should've took the air train." Light muttered.

"..." Larry suggested.

"No, I will not do a barrel roll." Light said angrily. "I'm going home." He added, walking away. Larry hesitated but followed suit. L though stayed behind, still screaming...

* * *

**Wolflink93: Well that's that. This took me forever to type as I had typed most of this. Now to explain the Family preview night thing. You see it's a thing me and Renodin had to do in band. I was able to make it funny when I said how it sounded like some kind of nerd convention. "How could you go to the Family preview night ice cream soical with out meeeeeee!" You have to say in a nasally voice. So, that's why I put that in there. And that's the end of this chapter. And since Renodin isn't with me right now. Replacing him will be Light.**

**Light: So, on that note. Please review. Or be tortured to death by the greatest band in the world Ice Screaming. Also this has been the longest chapter ever written for this story**


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